I had foot surgery last week. It was painful, and continues to be. I’m spending a lot of time in bed, while still trying to manage work and family responsibilities. I’m having to ask others for help, again and again, all day long.

This is not, shall we say, my forte.

I had a boss early in my career who was a wise and kind man. When I would go to him with a challenge (or, more often, a complaint), he’d respond, “What’s the lesson here?”

It was such a graceful, efficient shift. Not, what’s happening to me? But rather, what am I learning?

I’m learning a lot right now, it turns out. I’m certainly learning greater compassion for those living with chronic pain. I’m learning to let others step in. To receive. To ask for what I need, specifically, and trust others to let me know if they are able to provide it or not. I’m learning to distill the important into the necessary. What must be done? What must be done by me? What must be done by me in this moment?

And I suppose the best thing I’m learning is how incredibly supported I am. I have received meals, two separate bouquets of flowers, visits, check-in calls and texts, and more. My mother folded three loads of laundry, delivered my daughter’s forgotten medicine to school, walked the dog, and made me dinner, all in one day! And my cat pretty much hasn’t left my side, but that may have more to do with the weather than with me.

So what’s the lesson here? Quite a lot, and I am grateful for it. Wishing you support, compassion, and wisdom this holiday season.