People often ask me how to get their leaders onboard with the idea that empathy at work matters. Here’s my best advice:
- Engage your own empathy first. Did you know that 7 in 10 CEOs admit that consistently showing empathy at work is difficult for them, and 68% fear they’ll lose respect if they show empathy in the workplace? You may be frustrated over the slow pace of change or past empathy lapses, but try to approach leadership with openness and a desire to help.
- Show them the statistics. Leaders have to hear the business case first, and luckily, it’s easy to make. For instance, 80% of employees would leave their job for a more empathetic employer; 57% would take a pay cut to do so (Businessolver 2020); managers have a greater impact on mental health than doctors and therapists—equal to that of spouses and partners (UKG 2023); and team members with empathetic leaders are more creative, connected to their work and each other, and more likely to stay with their employer (Forbes, The Empathetic Leadership Advantage).
- Teach them how. Point out when others are empathetic and note explicitly what they’re doing, for example, “Jessamine sent a great email to her team thanking them for their hard work last week. What I really found impressive is that she thanked each of them individually and mentioned what they did. I heard from a few of them about what a big impact it had on them.” Being explicit helps others understand how to be empathetic, and why it matters.
- Normalize good behavior. Notice the leader expressing empathy and praise them for it. “I’m so glad you mentioned our mental health resources at staff meeting. They don’t get talked about enough.” In particular, look for opportunities to help them begin to think of themselves as empathetic: “Thanks so much for leading on these issues.” “You’re really showing the importance of empathy in our industry.”
Changing an office culture isn’t easy, but it’s not impossible, either. Taking steps today to help leaders become more empathetic will pay off in a healthier organization for many years to come.